Why did the cowboy die with his boots on?
Because he didn't want to stub his toe when he kicked the bucket!

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?
Missile toe!

Do you have any invisible ink?
Certainly sir. What colour?
How is business going?
I'm looking for a new cashier
But you only had a new one last week
Yes, that's the one I'm looking for!

Where do hamsters come?
Hampsterdam!

What kind of biscuit would you find at the south pole?
A penguin!

Why is the time in the USA behind that of England?
Because England was discovered before the USA!