A farmer's wife was at her lawyer's getting advice about a divorce. "He makes excessive sexual demands on me, Mr. Jones.""How do you mean?""Well, Mr. Jones," says the farmer's wife, "this morning I was looking at the chickens, when he crept up behind me and had me from behind!" "Chickens? Mrs. Smith, I didn't know you kept chickens.""We don't, Mr. Jones, we were at the Safeway supermarket!"