I can't do a thing with my hair-do.
I've tried but it's simply no use.
I can't make it stay where I put it today
with styling gel, hair spray, or mousse.

No bobby pin, brush, or bandanna,
can get my hair under control.
I've tried every comb, every clip in my home,
and covered my head with a bowl.

I've tried using forks in frustration.
I've tried using pokers and picks.
I've tried using straps; I've tried headbands and caps.
I've even tried shoestrings and sticks.

Regardless of how I attack it,
I simply cannot make it stay.
I guess I can't win, so I'll have to give in
and look like my students today.